How do autistics deal with eroticism?
One of my contacts on Tumblr, asks me how autistic people deal with the spectrum of eroticism on social and other media from the soft beginnings to more edgier expressions without becoming puritan nor pervert. This honest answer is written without much experience on the subject but with so much more zest.
First, autistic people differ a lot, there is a vast spectrum of different emotionally and sexually developed people. I am certainly not a specialist in autism, nor do I know so many autistic people that I can say something about the group. What I can do, is write about my experiences, and about those people who I know well (because I’ve spent a lot of time with them online or offline).
Eroticism is not a topic much talked about, it’s one of those topics that are taboo. Some, with or without autism, even get anxious if I begin talking about what’s called ‘adult entertainment’. I think they are a bit scared or even anxious to do something wrong, to be punished because of breaking rules or doing something illegal.
Most autistic people have a tendency to be scared or even anxious to be punished because of, unintended, breaking rules or doing something illegal
Some are also scared of being overstimulated of the view of erotic beauty (or ugliness), or what they haven’t yet experienced or have had bad experiences with, a lot of autistic people (especially women) have been (sexually or otherwise) harmed in their life. Some autistic people also have not developed to maturity as to sexuality or are uneven developed as to their body and mind.
A minority of the autistic people I know, on the other hand, are very fond of eroticism, like they are fond of edgier media. That consist mostly of collecting erotic pictures, movies, and all kinds of ‘things’, mostly neatly organized.
Some are searching for a group to belong to, others are enjoying the aesthetics of the body or search for a way of releasing the pressure of everyday life. Some, but not many of them share their collection on social media. There is of course the danger, like with all other things in life, that they get into trouble because they don’t know their boundaries, when en where to stop, and what really is forbidden.
There’s nothing wrong with eroticism provided that you realize that most men and women in real life, as well as their behavior, is different than what’s shown on erotic pictures and in movies.
To me eroticism is generally something that enriches my life. There’s nothing wrong with that when you also know that men and women in real life are different than what’s shown in pictures and in movies.
During my higher education years, I discovered eroticism and all the varieties up to soft and hard porn. At first, I didn’t know what to think of it, but I’ve never really been shocked or disgusted.
Autistic people are no perverts nor puritans
Of course, a lot of how autistic people deal with it, has to do with their life, their education, the way their friends think about this and how they see their own body and mind.
Autistic people are no perverts nor puritans, and most are something in between, or perhaps something of both (all depending on your view on both terms), but they are most of all people of flesh and blood, with a very vivid and sometimes somewhat naughty imagination.
